JCP is up on earnings, which were less than last year and pretty much not good, but the stock is up pre-market because I guess the trading world expected JCP to fall flat on their face. Here’s the Dow Jones news on the earnings: J.C. Penney Co.’s (JCP) fiscal fourth-quarter net income fell to $430 million, or $1.93 a share, from $477 million, or $2.09 a share, a year earlier.

I’ve decided that I would make a change here at Retard Trader, and start shilling for whatever I can. It seem that trading isn’t going to make me any money (F’ing GRMN, JCP, C, BIDU, etc…). So what better way to shill than to make a couple important post backs and get more traffic?

GRMN reported good earnings, above estimates by experts. Unfortunately someone let GRMN talking heads speak on a phone call and they came out saying something about higher costs and lower sales in the future. The result, I bought a put with my last dollars.

First let me say that watching the market head to the negative so well today would mean more to me if BIDU or JCP came out with deadly news. Instead it’s about CPI and some other tri-graph. There’s a little bad news for me, I bought more puts in JCP.

Here it is, the post that many of you have been waiting for.  Sadly, this post will likely have a larger view and reading count than other popular posts on Retard Trader like Timothy Sykes psychic detective, Trade Authorization: No, and the lead into this post which is Losing thousands of dollars.  The reason for the potential higher reading count, I have failed.

What’s it like to lose over $7,000 (yes, over seven thousand dollars)?  Well.. it pretty much sucks. I don’t know another single word definition to help what I’m feeling, well, not one that I would put on this website at least (this site is SFW, though not work related to most people).  Let me share my pain.

I just liked having a picture by picture look of the first minute of trading on the Scottrade screen.  Because of that, I took another 5 screen shots and decided to share.  Don’t look or click if you don’t want to.  Whatever.

As I sit here, somewhat hoping that BIDU announces complete failure to meet the street’s expectations, I think about how my recent run in trading has been painful.  Perhaps this is one of those “comes in threes” things, like celebrity deaths.

I got to see my puts in BIDU sink to really sickening levels.  I watched JCP go over $51, making my Feb08 $45 puts worth less than clicking a button to sell them.  And of course, C isn’t going anywhere near my calls of $30.  So I didn’t sell.  Again.

JCP is not going my way.  Actually, I guessed or hoped in the wrong direction.  It’s painful.  Of couse, if I were stupid I would have just settled for a loss instead of waiting out something to happen, like for me to lose all my money.  Can I really be this wrong?